[ It's been a month, and Peter sleeps like shit most nights. He hasn't gotten out of the habit of waking at every small noise, of swinging at the slightest hint of movement. Often he ends up lashing out at nothing but the darkness of his bunk, panting and sweating while his heart is trying its best to burst out of his chest.
He's not like that when Kasumi is there, though. When she has time to stay with them, her presence is a warm reminder -- you're home. she's safe. He still wakes, sure, and sometimes he'll accidentally wake her, too, but he at least isn't tense and wide-eyed and ready for a fight. He murmurs a quiet, Go back to sleep, and holds vigil until it's time to wake. But he doesn't tell her about his Bad Nights, much less how frequent they are; he doesn't tell any of the others, either, but he thinks Gamora knows. (She always seems to. She's scary like that.)
The Guardians are taking it easy on him, too, which somehow makes him feel worse. Like they're treading on eggshells around him. Like they feel they have to handle him like too-delicate porcelain, liable to shatter at the slightest misstep. It's infuriating. If Peter can act like he did before he ended up with the Ravagers again, why can't they?
God dammit. He just wants things to be normal again.
He's antsy as they wait for Kasumi to meet them. The drop off, surprisingly, went off without a hitch. Honestly, at this point, they all sort of expect something to go wrong -- and usually that "something" involves a hail of gunfire. But, no, the goods were transferred, payment was received, and the team headed back to the Milano for a well-deserved break from running errands around the galaxy.
But she's taking too long, isn't she? It's getting late, and she should've been here half an hour ago. Peter's sitting at the table in the common area, tapping out an anxious rhythm on its surface, and he thinks Groot is trying to reassure him, or at least telling him to calm down. Even after all this time, Peter still has trouble speaking Tree, and even if he could, he's not really in the mood to puzzle it out. So when the guy says, "I am Groot," Peter just waves a hand dismissively, then clenches his hands into fists.
Half an hour turns into an hour, turns into an hour and a half. When it hits two, Peter is well on his way to making a trench from all the pacing he's doing. Did something go wrong on her job? Did Yondu get a hold of her? Shit, she could be hurt, and he wouldn't even know. She could be bleeding out at this very instant, and he'd never find out except through her absence.
Fucking fuck. Why is he so fucking useless?
He turns to the bulkhead and reels back, ready to punch a dent in the metal, but suddenly Drax is there with his fingers wrapped tightly around Peter's wrist. The look on the guy's face is one of disapproval and concern, and Peter just-- returns his gaze with a blank stare.
"A ship has landed, Quill. I believe it is your thief." Try as he might, Peter could never get Drax to stop calling Kasumi that. "It would not do to injure yourself prior to meeting with her, my friend."
For a while, the words refuse to sink in, but then Gamora's voice is on the intercom, confirming what Drax just said -- Kasumi just landed and is making her way over. The tension leaves Peter in a rush, and only then does Drax release his grip, clapping him on the shoulder and taking his leave.
Peter slips on his customary jacket and opens the airlock and-- sure enough, there's Kasumi, staring at the sky. The hell's she doin' that for? ]
Hey. Kept me waiting, you know. [ He leans against the frame of the airlock. He tries to keep his voice light, but there's a thread of genuine worry and even a hint of anger that slips through, despite his better efforts. ]
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He's not like that when Kasumi is there, though. When she has time to stay with them, her presence is a warm reminder -- you're home. she's safe. He still wakes, sure, and sometimes he'll accidentally wake her, too, but he at least isn't tense and wide-eyed and ready for a fight. He murmurs a quiet, Go back to sleep, and holds vigil until it's time to wake. But he doesn't tell her about his Bad Nights, much less how frequent they are; he doesn't tell any of the others, either, but he thinks Gamora knows. (She always seems to. She's scary like that.)
The Guardians are taking it easy on him, too, which somehow makes him feel worse. Like they're treading on eggshells around him. Like they feel they have to handle him like too-delicate porcelain, liable to shatter at the slightest misstep. It's infuriating. If Peter can act like he did before he ended up with the Ravagers again, why can't they?
God dammit. He just wants things to be normal again.
He's antsy as they wait for Kasumi to meet them. The drop off, surprisingly, went off without a hitch. Honestly, at this point, they all sort of expect something to go wrong -- and usually that "something" involves a hail of gunfire. But, no, the goods were transferred, payment was received, and the team headed back to the Milano for a well-deserved break from running errands around the galaxy.
But she's taking too long, isn't she? It's getting late, and she should've been here half an hour ago. Peter's sitting at the table in the common area, tapping out an anxious rhythm on its surface, and he thinks Groot is trying to reassure him, or at least telling him to calm down. Even after all this time, Peter still has trouble speaking Tree, and even if he could, he's not really in the mood to puzzle it out. So when the guy says, "I am Groot," Peter just waves a hand dismissively, then clenches his hands into fists.
Half an hour turns into an hour, turns into an hour and a half. When it hits two, Peter is well on his way to making a trench from all the pacing he's doing. Did something go wrong on her job? Did Yondu get a hold of her? Shit, she could be hurt, and he wouldn't even know. She could be bleeding out at this very instant, and he'd never find out except through her absence.
Fucking fuck. Why is he so fucking useless?
He turns to the bulkhead and reels back, ready to punch a dent in the metal, but suddenly Drax is there with his fingers wrapped tightly around Peter's wrist. The look on the guy's face is one of disapproval and concern, and Peter just-- returns his gaze with a blank stare.
"A ship has landed, Quill. I believe it is your thief." Try as he might, Peter could never get Drax to stop calling Kasumi that. "It would not do to injure yourself prior to meeting with her, my friend."
For a while, the words refuse to sink in, but then Gamora's voice is on the intercom, confirming what Drax just said -- Kasumi just landed and is making her way over. The tension leaves Peter in a rush, and only then does Drax release his grip, clapping him on the shoulder and taking his leave.
Peter slips on his customary jacket and opens the airlock and-- sure enough, there's Kasumi, staring at the sky. The hell's she doin' that for? ]
Hey. Kept me waiting, you know. [ He leans against the frame of the airlock. He tries to keep his voice light, but there's a thread of genuine worry and even a hint of anger that slips through, despite his better efforts. ]
Could've given us a heads-up.